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I have always believed that a person is supposed to at least fight for and stand up for his or her own rights. All the same, I did not limit myself to some minimum. The only thing I did not think about was exile, about emigrating from my motherland.
I had previously spoken to my mother about going abroad. I had told her that I did not want to be uneducated, that I would go, study and come back. I knew I was not the type to actually leave but at least I could talk about it. My mother would say, "No, without you … I would not be able to tolerate your being in some distant place."
Then, after life fell apart, after the arrest of the members of the Reporters Committee and after death threats to Hesam Misaghi, Navid Khanjani[1] and myself, I was forced to go into hiding. My mother came to Mashhad one day and said, "Go … Sepehr go, do not stay here, go." It was then that I realized I had to face reality. The threats and the difficulty of imagining me in prison had left her with little energy and strength.
Because of my belief in the religion of Baha'ism I had tasted the bitterness of discrimination many times. My yearning to see my university entrance exam results was never fulfilled and I was forbidden from entering university[2]; of course, I was in much better condition than my friends who were being expelled from university after two or three semesters and despite good grades. We always felt a fear inside, the churning of prolonged threats.
I thought to myself, “What are those in prison or those who are sometimes killed guilty of? Guilty only of believing in a different religion?
I had seen off my Baha'i friends and relatives who had decided to flee and emigrate. I will never forget that cursed airport terminal where I had to say goodbye to my loved ones, those tears we shed with each other and for each other. I always asked myself, for what? Why shouldn't they have a way to study and work here? Why should they welcome the pain of distance in a life that is anyhow so transient…?
The kind of goodbyes that had been so painful and strange for me became my own destiny.
When I began receiving calls and threats from the intelligence service, , I was forced to make a decision, a choice that was all too easy to make. When you have only one choice, you have to go with that and the only option I had was to leave. Sometimes the choice is not only about you. Sometimes others are involved. I was not able to go on like that. I have to be honest with myself.
There were a thousand hurdles I had to go through in order to get out..............................
Go HERE to read the rest of Sepehr's story.I'm not ashamed of wanting to improve matters in my country, England and the UK, but I know I should recognize, and feel solidarity with, extraordinary challenges in so many other countries. -0-
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